Isolation within isolation

Painting of George Floyd

I was in the ICU from a double mastectomy at the beginning of the pandemic, and I was watching the news of what was happening in China and on cruise ships. I knew it wouldn’t be long until it arrived on our shores. When the lockdown began a month later, my life was not very different than before due to the fact I already lived a very isolated life due to disability. I was glad that maybe other people could finally see what it’s like to live a life in isolation.

I was shocked when I saw my neighbor bring home loads of bulk sized packs of toilet paper and paper towels. I thought, “How ridiculous,” Then I went to the store to get toilet paper and I couldn’t find any, so I nearly had a toilet paper crisis and had to get some from family members.

I began drinking again after I had just overcome drinking too much when I was hospitalized and then in recovery from my surgery, so I turned to marijuana to cope. I spent the rest of 2020 (8 months) stoned during all my waking hours.

I was horrified by the George Floyd murder and glued to CNN as I watched all the protests. I drew a picture of George Floyd in memoriam.

Summer came and I found that I had I gained 10 lbs so I had to get new pants. But stores were closed at first, and even when re-opened, customers couldn’t try on clothes because of the pandemic. Then I started obsessively shopping online due to the fact that stores seemed to be practically giving stuff away, they were selling stuff so cheap (a lot of 70% off sales). Now I have a whole new wardrobe, but nowhere to wear it.

I spent Christmas alone, but it was nice because we had 4 inches of snow on Christmas Eve.

I finally quit smoking pot, but ended up getting back on cigarettes, so I started losing weight. I also joined AA, but I have to attend meetings on Zoom which I don’t like because I don’t have a computer and can only do it on my phone.

The worst part of the year, aside from the George Floyd murder, was watching Trump doing nothing to help the pandemic as we watched the death rate climb.

I was elated that he lost, but he’s never conceded. He’s even attracted coup de’ ta. He’s continues to do nothing but lie to the public about everything including the pandemic. I hoped when he got COVID-19, maybe he would wake up and have some compassion and empathy. But, alas, it had no effect except to strengthen his belief that Coronavirus is harmless.

Thank God he’ll be gone on January 20th, 2021, especially since the vaccine roll-out has been an epic fail. All the sane people are counting on the Biden administration to turn things around. Maybe we can return to normal this year.